2008-12-07 21:54:08

Ironman (Xbox360)

When it comes to comic books, I've never been too crazy about them, I've read a few here and there, and from that I derived my interest in very specific characters. My particular breed of superhero is generally either the anti-hero, or the hero that does not have a super power. From that is born my love of Ghost Rider, Punisher, Batman, and of course, Ironman. Some may say that Tony Stark's Wiley Coyote level of innovation plunges him into having the super power of being a super genius. but I really don't think of a high IQ as something earth shattering. Now that you have the backstory, maybe you'll understand why I pulled out my spoon, and dug into the huge steamy brown pie of shit that Ironman is.

As you can see from the left panel, with my list of reviews, comic book games tend to fall into a trap of sucking beyond words. granted there are exceptions to every rule, but it's better to just assume that it's going to blow right out of the gate, doubly so if it's based on the movie. If you look at the case for the game and the DVD of the game it certainly looks like the suit you see in the Movie Ironman (which I highly recommend you go see, go do it now, I'll wait here. You'll understand the frustration with the game better this way, just trust me.) and when you first start the game you get his old school mark 1 ironman suit that Tony and the doctor built inside the desert cave of the ten rings. So you get all pumped up to live the movie, unfortunately it doesn't quite work that way.

See what they apparently did in order to keep the game exciting, was mingle the flavor of the movie, with the stories from the comic. Granted this should give you all flavors of awesome. but upon first glance you can see the cutscene writers try to stick to a sembelence of the movie script, but take gigantic leaps away from it in order to fill the niche for the gameplay, and it comes off looking like a shitty hackjob. Cludged together with lots of splicing tape and no direction. If you think back to the movie you might realize that there's only a total of 3 fight scenes in the whole movie. there's the first suit, there's the battle in the desert with the new suit, and then there's the finale battle with Iron Monger. Obviously like most Comic games we can't have anything like an adventure game, it has to be all action for our ADD Ritalin addled minds. so instead of doing things as Tony, then as Iron man, etc we end up having to kill generic dudes enmass. sometimes following the movie script and other times following a matchup from the comics. These matchups are interesting and challenging. there is no shortage of difficulty to be had here, in some cases the game becomes overwhelmingly hard. This may be due to the customization options I chose, as I wanted to go the indestructable route and apparently that didn't work out quite as planned.

Almost at the end of the game, I'm battling Radioactive Man and AIM, and they have a weapon called Natasha, which can one shot me and instantly shut down the Ironman suit. So I end up having to spend most of that battle hiding behind things so Natasha doesn't kill me. Sadly shortly after that Radioactive man does me in. I was in a bad shape. So I decided maybe I can take advantage of 1 man army to gain some money. Only thing is, one man army is only to unlock the other custom skinz for your suits. That did me no good.

So I tried to replay the other missions to grind money enough to boost my weapons. Apparently you only make additional money by doing BETTER at the mission than you did last time. So you can't just grind a level, you have to grind it better than you did last time. So essentially there is a law of diminishing returns, met with a distinct money ceiling per mission. Needless to say I was stranded, and with no way to sell off upgrades I decided weren't in my best interest to have taken, the game became impossible to beat. So I packed it up and kicked that pile of shit out of my house..

Now before you all just tell me I'm wussing out on the game and that my reasons for hating it are stupid and weak. I'll break it down for you a bit more on some things that this game could have done better. Let's pop the hatch on this bucket of shit and pick through to find the kernels of "wisdom". .

Let's start with the confused setting. Coming from someone who unfortunately hasn't read many Ironman comics, as much as I love the character. I don't know about all his battles, I'm aware of his battles with Mandarin and his role in helping out the Avengers, but I don't know much about who AIM is except what I learned from Marvel Ultimate Alliance. This game pulls heavily from the Comic and loosely paints over it all in Movie flavoring. So basically it's a case of came for a movie game, stayed for a comic book game. This writing confusion just makes the entire plot setup seem like a weak attempt to shoehorn in enough action to keep people happy while cashing in on the new movie style. What we could've seen here instead was a more coherent plot, based around comic book involvements only, using the new suit design and some of the movie characters. Almost like a sequel to the movie in Video Game form. We all know that Ironman the Movie is lacking in heavy combat scenes, so ditch that script, it's only making you come out desperate..

The controls, when walking it always seems like Ironman walks way too fast compared to how fast a human would walk and he's hard to control on the ground, so you constantly run into stuff accidentally, and it makes it hard to manuever and destroy things while sitting on the ground. When I first starting playing I thought the flying controls were kind clumsy, but as I played it more I came to understand and the flight controls are pretty good. The only problem I found with flying is that your target lock capability isn't good enough for when you are doing true flight. Basically you end up overshooting a lot of targets and having to come back around for a second pass or hover in in order to kill something off, where as it would be much cooler and better to allow us to target enemies more remotely so when we're flying in at a crazy clip we can at least get the enemy HP down pretty good, if not outright destroyed before we have to make another flyover or stop our flight in progress. As a game the focus is on fun, and it's no fun to have to hover and get pummelled in order to kill the enemy, I want to be able to zip around in flight and kill the enemy.

All in all I had high hopes for Ironman, and he just didn't deliver, with a hacked up story and poor control choices, I have to say this may very well be one of the worst Comic hero games I've played. though not as bad as Superman 64, Superman Returns did flight controls way better than this game! 1/10 for not being the game I expected, with poor control choices and it being an utter dick and having 1 shot unblockable death rays.

Reason Rank
Start 10
Outta my way I'm IRONMAN! +7
wtf walk around the bridge support, not through it! -5
Target locked at range, oh shit just past it try again, same thing, fuck! -5
One shot deaths are the best!